The most difficult thing for me being an RA is being so silly and optimistic. Ironically, its also my most favorite part of the Job. The energy that my co-workers generate is real, ridiculous, and intimidating. However, call me cynical, but I love the feeling of being overwhelmed. It becomes a challenge. I go through the following phases: " Oh shit, I can't do this" to "Oh shit, this is gonna be hard but I will try" and finally "I am gonna nail this and so much more!"
The intimidation comes from the mass of big personalities in this job. Plenty of people right now are probably like "Dude, what the hell are you talking about?! You have that!" but, I guarantee there a bunch of people that are reading this like " Yo, Dude, what's with that? You need more of that."
This leads into my main point for this entry (to all 2 of you people that read this thing): we all socially adjust to our surroundings depending on what is need in a specific situation. This is a big generalization because I said "we all" when really I mean, "some people I have noticed at certain times...sometimes." In other words, challenge my flawed thesis, and then leave a comment after you have done that.
Since you were a child, you might have noticed how impressionable you were. Mannerisms, speech rhythm and facial expressions all being unintentionally copied from parents, neighbors, friends etc. I think the same thing is true for personalities for some people. I find myself really shy around extremely confident people. Then, when I am around a group of shyer people , its easier for me to be that person that is the most outgoing. This also explains why you probably have that friend you always look up to for being so courageous, but when you bring it up to that friend, you are halted with a " no way! Me? Courageous? Thanks for the compliment, but there is just no way!"
The trick is learning when to become more like a Chameleon. A Chameleon can match its environment. So when it is in an environment that requires more brown, it becomes more brown. So, the goal is to use what is learned from a strong friend, in a situation that requires strength, without the necessity of "weak people"--for a lack of better words. Like an off/on switch to your potential.
Just the other day, I was talking to my friend about how admirable she was for being so good at making big decisions as I watched her take charge of a group indecisive people. She replied with a pshhh sound of disbelief. She told me, " I am never good at making decisions. They just suck at it."
I believe her.
Villainy.
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